Being a student again

I was recommended to apply the ISIC card when I booked flight ticket to HK. Great...I'd have student discount after September, when my existing student card expired :)

Graduation shows in London

What's an excuse to stay away from work and visited graduation shows at Camberwell College of Arts, Central Saint Martins, London College of Communication and Royal College of Arts...Enjoyable to look at the students' works...and it reminded me that I did not join the graduation show at my BA study...

Symposium

今日完成了這學年最後的一個symposium。雖然前一天已經暫定了畫畫，只是輕鬆地做powerpoint，做書dummy(第一次bind硬皮書，原來較相象中簡單……不過我還很想學做線裝書)。

以為自己會不緊張，但當同學present時，我不能專心聽他們所說的。我提意同學幫我拍些present時相片，其後同學笑說她之前不停地叫我望鏡頭。我知道自己演說時多數望著電腦，或只是輕輕望望遠處的同學。無留意project在牆上的圖畫有沒有偏色，因為我怕向後望，亦不敢望不停寫字的老師。

同學驚嘆我剛好在timer到時時完成，有人對我的表現讚好。當其後的同學出場時，我仍然在坐位上表現緊張。

記得自己以前在公共圖書館的講座上，曾經很有自信地在台上演講；記得那時候獨個兒，到一間公司介紹自己的proposal時，亦很有自信。最緊張的一次，是讀書時向機場管理局present有關機場標示的改善計劃。因為那次的要求很高， 我是project coordinator，代表著大學,在機場高層、老師和同學面前，我緊張得把pointer指向自己……

有時候，我把自己分開了兩個人。雖然商業插畫和個人插人的創作靈感都是來自己的經歷，但很多時因為自己唸平面設計出身，很了解project的目的、動機和其後演繹手法。當自己做插畫工作時，便大概了解和滿足到客戶希望達到的。

今年到倫敦讀書，最希望是從新了解自己，無論是插畫手法、文化價值、內心感受……每個人對不同人和事表現出不同的自己。而在這短短的一年，自己不停分析自己，最想別人從我的作品上知道的是怎麼的一個我？

對我來說，其實真的很難……因為那些「我」太極端了，那些複雜又矛盾的自己。最後，在自己的故事書上，把自己對自然/天氣/人的感情表現出來，是一些自我價值。

兩次presentation，同學們說我同一個故事背景，表現手法改變了很多。是的，自己在不畫畫的時候不停重看以往幾年的畫和自己喜歡的電影或其他東西，解剖和分析自己。今天向我的韓國同學道謝，因為他那次很直接地說不喜歡不代表我的畫，太簡單表面，從以令我認真地看自己認真想做的，不是為工作而做的作品。他們說喜歡我今天的作品，令我回復自信……因為之前老師不喜愛呢……

壓力來了。當我離開英國的時候，大家會好奇這所謂「插畫師」在這年除了不去工作外，還做了甚麼。我只是做了一本繪本，講一個簡單易明，有關我的童年，有關天氣的故事。你會問我這麼簡單的書，何需用一年時間去做。我會記得老師所說，複雜的故事和創作背景，只有作者能體會到。要讓讀者明白，是面前簡單的總結便足夠。

每天，我感謝自己有幸到外地進修。我得到的，不是一本書， 而是一個自己 。

Perception - 2

You think you are contented

Perception - 1

You are not gentleman

Chinese name

Photo shared from http://www.cowrice.com/

Cowrice is a brand created by Eva's friend. I really appreciate what they are working and I kept re-reading their book about Grace's and her family's life in HK. I clicked into their blog recently and I was touched.

Ying Ying, daughter of Grace and Philip, reminded Ying Ying (I hope I did not translated it wrongly) to remember the meaning of her Chinese name. Don't be washed away from English name.

When I arrived London, many classmates asked me why my name is Jasmine, an English name. In fact, it is 'necessary' for Hong Kong people to have English because it is easily called and remembered by either Chinese and foreigner. It is a bit 'impolite' to call someone in their Chinese name directly after you have left secondary school.

But, I'd use my Chinese name more later...cos' it has its own meaning chosen by my parents. My Chinese name is 晞華 (Hei Wah) , 晞 (Hei) means sunshine in early morning, since I was born in the morning....actually I was born in typhoon signal number 10, and 華 (Wah) is a word from my 'family name book' :)

Smallest eraser in my life

It was 7mm only and I did not want to give it up. I enjoyed using it not because it is from Muji, maybe...it helped me a lot on my works from the days I am in Hong Kong.

Carry on

Here is my working place from 9am to 12am everyday...it should be more messy in reality...I have prepare the 'flat page' for storyboard revision/pagination. 1st draft on the floor, book preview on computer, 2nd draft (hope it'd be final artwork) and book dummy on table. Keep fingers crossed, everything will be fine :)

Learn from life

Photo taken in Taiwan, 2011

得知姐姐的朋友過身後，在家哭了數天。後悔以前他和家人到訪時沒有好好跟他說話，亦擔心他太太和年幼的女兒日後的生活。跟他認識了15年，他是我們家重要的「和事佬」 。當年家人反對我的男友時，他和姐姐製造機會讓我爸爸媽媽了解這男生…然而我們最後都分手了。他女兒出世，是我們家的喜事。可愛的小公主為我家帶來生氣，打破一向可怕的沉默。 

謝謝朋友們的禱告，我堅強了，因為我要支持較我傷心的姐姐和他的家人。我亦相信他現在在他要到的地方。或許，他成為了史上最肥的天使，守護著大家。當我返回香港後，我會好好照顧他女兒的學業。 

這是我第二次到英國讀書。這次跟7年前當交流生的感受很不同。那次我是起初不習慣一個人，但三個月後我便不想回港，只想繼續留在他鄉生活。雖然今次出國讀書自己支持所有費用，但有時候我覺得自己對不起我的家人。因為要大家從我第一日到達倫敦遺失了財物便開始擔心。他們擔心我的健康、情緒，擔心我的財政。我很想留在他們身邊，特別是大家的朋友離世時。 

以前自己很嚮往做backpacker的日子，留學時偷偷地到北歐一個多月，沒人知曉。有一晚跟旅伴沒有準備住的，晚上在零下十多度的巴士站外面，心裡倒數早上第一班巴士的來臨。那夜，大家冷得不能開口，不能活動任何關節，最後沒有凍死是大幸。2年前嘗試到國內工作，每日一個人來回深圳和香港。有晚11點多才准許離開公司，父母擔心。有同事陪我回港，兩人在關口扮振定，其實害怕得很。為什麼這時間這關口的人特別可怕? 兩人到巴士上要求其他睡覺中的乘客跟我們換兩人座位。我們曾因護照不同，在海關分開了，不想再分開。第二天早上回家後，父母終於安心了…… 

大姐姐不希望我在外國發展，因為家人們在同一個城市中，可以互相照顧。我在台灣時感受到她的好意。我到英國前，跟爸爸媽媽往新竹看二姐姐。我們到投城看「搶孤」。天氣突然轉差，風大雨大。所有在海邊的人都跑開了，我和家人都走失。我緊張地走到不同攤位找回媽媽，知道姐姐和爸爸回到車上，大家安心了。在咖啡店換走全濕的衣物，只想一家人在一起，然後向在香港的大姐姐報平安。 

很想去西班牙，很想去其他地方。但我感受到家人在香港的擔心時，我只想回香港，繼續跟他們一起 。「和事佬」不在，大家更學懂了愛惜身邊的人。 

Henna

Rest in peace

Sorry my friend, I was not in Hong Kong when I heard of your news. I was not able to take care of your wife and Sasa when they are so helpless and painful.  I hope I am sitting beside my sister and support her. I am sorry that I still could not believe you have left us in the world. You were my family member, who kept supporting and encouraging me. I will miss you a lot. I will be strong, no crying. I will take care of your wife and Sasa. Sasa will be the most healthiest and happiest kid in her new school.

Rest in peace, my dearest friend, Daniel. We will meet each other one day again.

Fake herbivores

Sorry that I could not pick up your call

Real one

Exhausted

I hope to draw more on my personal sketchbook...instead of working on my project. But, I contributed all of my time onto my final project now. Let me re-post something from my old blog : )

I tried to draw at Uffizi Gallery in Florence...I was serious, but came up with something cute again... :p

Hong Kong Art

Apart from the European illustration history, I tried to read some books related to the Arts in Hong Kong, and some related to Ai Wei Wei (a Chinese artists). I just wanna know more abouts arts, and its relationship to the cultural/historical background of my home town.

Final project...

I will be working harder on my final book project. Firstly, I have typed the story on Word, and then drew the storyboard in small scale, likes a movie storyboard. Afterward, revise and revise and revise the story, and drew 1:1 layout on sketchbook. I enlarged them into A3, scanned them and check scale...and revise them in other scale...and I hope I go to next stage in the following days. Keep fingers crossed...so nervous...

Old textbook from HK

When I was on holiday at Aunt's home during the Jubilee holiday, I discovered these at my room. It was my cousin's Chinese textbook which were published many years ago. Yeah, he tried to learn Chinese...haha....I enjoyed looking at the illustrations, which reflects the 70s Hong Kong.

Queen's Diamond Jubilee

I ate my queen at the festival~

V&A Friday Late

Theme of May Friday Late in V&A, was 'Dinner is Served'. In this 1 year study in London, I really enjoy to learn more from events in different museums, apart from in college (as mentioned by our tutor all the time, it is independent study...). UK is famous with its traditional tea culture. On the Friday Late, I learnt to 'taste' different teas with different cups. They were English tea (Earl Grey), Japanese green tea and India black tea. I am glad to know there is close relationship between tea and cup design. The shape of the cup is designed to 'hold the fragrance' and affect the temperature of the tea. Same tea, tastes different with different cup.

Thanks Peter Ting, a ceramic designer specialized on tableware. He is so enthusiastic on food, tableware design. I was happy to know more about table lying. Everything on the table in cosy restaurant don't have to be expensive, creativity and flexibility is the most important.

I hope I can join more 'Friday Late' again.

Friendship

There is distance, there is sensitivity with each other

At the time I am alone